| (no subject) |
[Feb. 12th, 2005|03:29 pm] |
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well i girls are idiots, and once again i'm single and lovin' it. haha |
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| werid shit |
[Feb. 10th, 2005|03:43 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | regreat & stressed | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | transplants | ] |
so i'm watching daria right now and i just heard the song hip-hop by dead prez playing in the back round. daria rules, dead prez rules, gotta get that cd back.
i have another interview at coldstone on friday at 5:45 with yogsh, i think thats how you spell his name. i'm also positive that i'll get the job, which rules cause i'll work in the mornings by myself after i learn everything. i really need money right now, but i'll get into that later. i was also looking in the classifieds today & found out that a newspaper company forget which is looking for people to deliever papers in the dupage county area, so i gotta call that place asap.
i hate when people complain about how sad they are on livejournal & then go on & on about how things will never get better & that they are just gonna rot away & not try to change anything. well lately i've been stressing out as usual, over getting into college, getting a job & getting my life back on track. which has lead me to think i'm bi polar, well i have some symptoms of it. i haven't slept in a couple days, i just sit in bed & worry about everything i can possibly worry about until i go crazy. it really sucks because i usually when i'm really happy i'm just down & don't want to do anything but all the drugs i can find to escape the empty feeling. the feeling that no one cares anymore, no one will care, i'll just fade away to where ever i go in life. & the feeling of being all alone & everything makes my reality obscure. i just get it in my head that i'm always going to stand alone, like the line has been drawn & everyone is on the otherside. my beliefs & views just seem to get looked down opon, the people i want to share my opinions & knowledge with don't seem to care all that much. some do yeah but most don't give to shits. i don't know, i just feel bad cuz i said things i shouldn't have without thinking & i should have atleast waited till i was out of this state of mind to justify things. i just feel really bad cuz, i think i said things that made someone close to me sad & i don't want that. afterwards i sat down & thought about what i said & how i felt. i hate being down it fucks with how i feel & think, which leads me to fucking things up. well i don't have anything else to say. peace |
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| so i'm a hippie kid? |
[Feb. 8th, 2005|11:09 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  tired | ] |
what decade does your personality live in?
quiz brought to you by lady interference, ltd
well besides that everything is good. had an interview at coldstone today and it went good. i'll know if i got the job by the end of the week. kim and i are doing good, we push eachothers bottons a lot but we're working on having that not happen anymore. brady and i have become better friends in these past weeks which is good. he's got a good head on his shoulders i just hope he doesn't make the same mistakes i did when it comes to school. other than that, i've been chillin with josh in the city and smokin' the ganj, which i think more people need to fucking open their eyes to and stop hatin on people that do. peace. |
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| (no subject) |
[Feb. 1st, 2005|08:59 pm] |
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i hate people. they're so fucking stupid. 1 they fucking forget you all the time when you always try to include them. well it's about time to say fuck off, i'm done with you. 2 people labeling me as a pothead fuck off. stop bitching about every little thing. fucking put a smile on your face already. and don't fucking judge me. everyone can fuck off |
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| new tattoo |
[Jan. 31st, 2005|01:56 pm] |
that is my new tattoo, done by dave lobes at josh's house like 3 or 4 days ago at 1 in the morning, steve got one to that's badass, that's all i have to say peace. |
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| this sucks |
[Jan. 26th, 2005|01:41 pm] |
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due my me being lazy and not having a job my funds have run out, so i've been forced to quit smoking. |
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| what up motha fucka? |
[Jan. 24th, 2005|05:09 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | aderal insomnia | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | leftover crack- look who's talking | ] |
so much good news lately. still jobless and i don't know if i'm getting into school yet. but its cool, i should get a job at all you see on tv with belmont and eliado soon. haven't gotten a tattoo yet but i'm going to plan on getting it by friday. had a crazy fucking trip to the city on thursday. long story short (haha if you only knew what i was laughing at) i drove the bryants van to the city to stop at uic and to pick up josh. eric, lydia, brady and i went. on the way there eric had to pee really bad, & we were stuck in really bad traffic, it took us 3.5 hours to get to uic from home, anyways so eric's comes up with the idea that he's going to jump out the van and take a piss just like on the side of the highway. he said he'd only go if i gave my consent , so i finally said fine. he jumps out and runs up a hill into what we later found out was the south side of chicago. we lose eric and can't find him. we park the car, brady and i get out and search for like an 1 and a half for him scared he's gonna be dead, while lydia was just sitting in the mini van by herself. brady and i walk like 3 exits and finally get a phone call from maggie and find out eric somehow made it to uic, wholey shit! i guess he ran into a bunch of crack heads and then finally took a bus there. and later that night on our drive to get josh i yelled at eric like crazy and pissed him off really bad. but now everything is cool between us. we actually are starting a band, him, iriving & i. we have been jaming together a lot & we are gonna cover two choking victim songs for now. it fucking rules. and last but certainly not least kim & i are going out as of jan 15. its going really good & i had some doubts at first but she said things that totally made me change my mind. i also made a new screen name if anyone cares its, meatbread w3, so kids life is turning around for ole meatbread, peace, unity, history, i'm out. |
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| boring |
[Jan. 14th, 2005|12:18 am] |
[sexual orientation] straight
[marital status] i'm seeing someone but weren't not offical yet
[height] 5'11'' ?
[shoe size} 9
[parents still together] i think
[siblings] christine: 15
[pets] dog, jasper
[in school/graduated] dropout but going back i think
favourites:
[colour] black&white&red
[number] 666
[animal] none?
[drinks] koolaid
[pop] trying to quit it
[book] uh the bible duh
[colour yr hair?] not for a long time
[twirl yr hair?] no
[have tattoos?] o yeah
[have Ppercings?] fuck that
[have a boyfriend?] he's in jail
[cheat on tests/homework?] yeah
[drink/smoke?] yeah
[like roller coasters?] yeah
[wish lived somewhere else?] uh yeah
[want more piercings?] no
[like cleaning?] like getting kicked in the junk?
[write in cursive or print?] print
[sweat a lot?] all the fucking time
[own a web cam?] uh no
[know how to drive?] if thats what you wanna call it
[diet?] that's all i do
[own a cell phone?] yeah
[ever get off the damn computer?] yeah
[been in a fist fight?] yes
[kicked someone in the nuts?] no that's horrible
[stolen anything?] yeah
[held a gun?] nope
[drank?] yeah
[been so drunk you couldn't remember your name?] yeah
[considered being a hooker?] no herpes for me
[cheated on someone?] nope
[cried over a girl?] no way
[cried over a boy?] nope
[lied to someone?] all the time
[been in love?] don't know
[fallen for your best friend?] no
[made out with JUST a friend?] kinda
[been rejected?] yup
[been in lust?] na that's creepy
[used someone?] yeah like the kids that make me drive them around
[been used?] look up
[been cheated on?] i think once
[been kissed?] yeah
[experimented with homosexuality?] no
currents...
[current clothing] black hoodie, choking victim t-shirt, kaki pants, black socks, black&white boxers, belt
[current mood] tired and coughing
[current taste] cherry cough make better thing
[what you currently smell like] cigarettes probably
[current hair] dirty short smelly
[current thing I ought to be doing] catching up on sleep
[current cds in stereo] morning glory, the clash, immortal technique
[current crush] my boo
[current job] uh husla
[Last book you read] youth in revolt
[last movie you saw] trainspotting
[last thing you ate] poptarts
[last person you talked to on the phone] josh
[do drugs?] what kind?
[have a dream that keeps coming back?] no
[play an instrument?] yeah
[believe there is life on other planets?] probably
[still love him/her?] no i hate that bitch
[read the newspaper?] no
[have any gay or lesbian friends?] no i dont think so
[believe in miracles?] not really
[believe it's possible to remain faithful forever?] yeah but it'll lead to suicide
[believe in God?] yeah i'm right here
[do well in school?] if i want to
[go to college?] no
[wear hats?] no unless its cold and i want cancer
[hate yourself?] not anymore
[have an obsession?] not really
[have a secret crush?] no
[collect anything?] pocket lint
[have a best friend?] yeah tha trio
[close friends?] not really
[like your handwriting?] yeah
[care about looks?] sometimes
love life
[first crush] juliet sandstrom 4rd grade bitches
[first kiss] sucked dick
[single or attached?] single now
[do you believe in love at first sight?] if you're an idiot looking for disaster
[do you believe in "the one?"] who
[describe your ideal significant other] no that's way to complicated
[have you ever played a game that required removal of clothing?] no
[are you a tease?] no those bitches get cut
[shy to make the first move?] yeah it sucks
are you a...
[wuss] not always
[druggy] no
[daydreamer] yes
[freak] that's what i've been called in ohio
[dork] high school
[bitch/asshole] yup
[brat] no
[sarcastic] of course
[angel] satan rules
[devil] satan does rule
[shy] yeah
[talkative] no
[flirty] i'm no slut |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 11th, 2005|06:42 am] |
 i drew this picture a long long time ago and i just found it the other day.
 drew it a couple nights ago don't like the feathers but everything else is good.
 i wrote and drew all that shit tonight |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 10th, 2005|04:14 am] |
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i hate waiting to know if my future will bring easier days or just be a hopeless struggle |
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| (no subject) |
[Jan. 8th, 2005|05:08 pm] |
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it's time for a new beginning |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 30th, 2004|01:04 pm] |
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haven't updated in forever, haven't gotten a new tattoo, probably won't for a long time. o well. women are taking up most of my thinking time. but now i'm in a little pickle. see there is a really cool girl in the circle, who is attractive, but i dont know much about her mentally besides her personality, which can lead to problems, but i still want to give it a try. then there is some chick from myspace who's like into metal and seems like my type of chick, and she's out of the circle, but i dont trust anyone from west chicago. so basically if things fall through with one girl, i'll just move to the next. but i dont want them to fall through. so we'll see. i have my little eye on the girl in pink shoes, and hopefully tonight, or tomorrow night will make things alright. |
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| ya bored |
[Dec. 26th, 2004|02:53 pm] |
[ ] I miss somebody right now.
[ ] I have dated someone at least 10 years older (or younger)
[x] I care about someone right now.
[ ] I don’t watch much TV these days.
[ ] I love olives
[x] I love sleeping.
[ ] I own lots of books
[x] I wear glasses or contact lenses.
[ ] I love to play video games.
[x]currently have a crush on someone.
[ ]I have been cheated on
[ ] Have had my heart broken
[ ]Im in a ralationship
[x]i am single
[x] I’ve tried marijuana.
[x] I’ve watched porn movies.
[ ] I have been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
[x] I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
[x] I curse all the time.
[x] I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
[x] I have a hobby.
[ ] I’ve been told I: (women) have an applebottom, (men) am packing
[x] I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me
[ ] I’ve never broken someone’s bones.
[ ] I have a secret that I am ashamed to reveal.
[ ] I hate the rain.
[x] I’m paranoid at times.
[x] I need money right now!
[ ] i love Sushi.
[ ]I talk really, really fast.
[ ] I have fresh breath in the morning.
[ ] I have semi-long hair.
[ ] I have lost money in Las Vegas
[x] I have at least one brother and/or one sister.
[ ] I was born in a country outside of the U.S.
[x] I shave my legs (females) or face (males) on a regular basis
[ ] I have a twin.
[ ] I have worn fake hair/fingernails/EYELASHES in the past.
[ ] I couldn’t survive without Caller I.D.
[ ] I love the way i look.
[ ] I have lied to a good friend in the last 6 months.
[ ] I know how to cornrow but im not black.
[x] I am usually optimistic
i try to be
[ ] I have a lot of mood swings.
[x] I think prostitution should be legalized
[ ] I think Britney Spears is hot.
[ ] I have a hidden talent
[ ] I’m always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
[ ] I think that I’m popular.
[ ]I have kissed someone of the same sex
[ ]I enjoy talking on the phone.
[ ] I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
[ ] I love to shop.
[ ] I would classify myself as ghetto
[ ] I’m bourgie and have worn a sweater tied around my shoulders
[ ] I’m obsessed with my Xanga or Livejournal.
[ ] I don’t hate anyone.
[ ] I’m a pretty good dancer.
[ ] I don’t think Mike Tyson raped Desiree Washington
[ ] I’m completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother
[x] I have a cell phone.
[ ] I watch MTV on a daily basis.
[x] I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months
[ ] I love drama.
[ ] I have never been in a real relationship before.
[x] I’ve rejected someone before.
[x] I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
[ ] I want to have children in the future
[ ] I have changed a diaper before.
[ ] I’ve called the cops on a friend before
[ ] I bite my nails.
[ ] I am a member of the Tom Green fan club
[ ] I’m not allergic to anything
[x] I have a lot to learn.
[x] I am very shy around the opposite sex.
[ ] I’m online 24/7, even as an away message.
[x]I have at least 5 away messages saved.
[x] I have tried alcohol and drugs before.
[ ] I have made a move on a friend’s significant other in the past
[ ] When I was a kid I played "the birds and the bees" with a neighbor or chum
[ ] One of those neighbors was the same sex.
[ ] I enjoy some country music.
[x] I would die for my best friends
[ ] I think that Round Table is the best pizza
[ ] I watch soap operas whenever I can
[ ] I’m obsessive, anal retentive, and often a perfectionist.
[ ] I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all
[ ] I know all the words to Slick Rick’s "Children’s Story"
[x] Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
[ ] I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it
[ ] I have dated a close friend’s ex
[x] I am happy at this moment.
not happy not sad, just confused
[x] I am Pissed at the world right now
i do hate everyone
[ ] I masturbate every day
no just every other day |
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| do something that's great, time will never wait |
[Dec. 20th, 2004|07:13 pm] |
so i've been hangin out with eric a lot lately. and it's really cool. i thought that stephanie and i were the only ones who agreed on things when it comes to living life; but eric and i agree on so much more. he truely is one of the best friends i've ever had and i hope it stays that way. espically since lately steve and i haven't talked at all or really hung out. he spends all of his free time with shari, but whatever if it makes him happy then its cool.
last but not least, i'm going to be getting another tattoo, for almost free, i just have to design it and call him up again. wait what's that? what am i going to be getting, after i draw em out i'll post em. peace. unity. history. |
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| no where to go, no one on your side, only you think its right |
[Dec. 16th, 2004|04:22 am] |
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well i haven't had an emo post so here it goes. i feel like i'm losing friends. i feel empty and sad and lost inside, i just don't care at all about anything anymore. i just shrug everything off that happens to me, i just sit around by myself and try to escape or try to hide. poeple have been asking me why i don't cuddle with everyone when its movie time, and i dont know why i don't. well its like a drug, you're close to someone for a couple hours then there is nothing, and it sucks. when you go from feeling relaxed and all optimistic and positive and then you go to nothing again. i don't know, i think to much at times. i need to sleep for a while, but considering that i keep walking up early, cause people calling me and my house being loud at 6 in the morning, i doubt i'll sleep much. but eh whatever, 6 dollars and a pack of cigarettes would be good right now, i just wish i could find someone already. |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 15th, 2004|02:44 pm] |
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6 dollars and a pack of cigarettes, would you do it? cause that's how much my ass is worth |
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| (no subject) |
[Dec. 12th, 2004|11:52 pm] |
today and every other sunday sucked. ba hum bug. the days just get longer and longer around here and its sad. things used to be fun, i had no worries, no problems with small stupid bullshit, now it all just bugs me. instead of things getting better they have just been getting worse. it sucks, but what can i do about it? whatever fuck this bulllllllllllshit.
tomorrow hopefully josh can get me a job with his anut, and after that we are going to apply at lowe's. so hopefully i'll get a job. i never wanna get woken up at 9 in the morning again. peace you dirty bitches |
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meatbread's journal
